What Beliefs Are Holding You Back?

Are any of the following beliefs, yours?

1. I am not good at math so I won’t ever pass a math class, so why should I even try?

2. I have ADHD and I won’t ever be successful

3. My parents told me that “You’re not special so don’t act like you are.” So I believe I’m not special.

4. I’m super competitive and want to win so badly, so I won’t play a game, play a sport, run for any office because it will be so devastating if I lose

5. Someone told me that I’ll never amount to anything. That’s true, I haven’t.

6. I have nothing to be thankful for

7. I don’t have friends because everyone hates me

8. I can’t do that because I’m _______________( add your gender here).

9. I feel guilty because I’ve done something that my religious beliefs that I’ve grown up with have made me believe that what I’ve done is wrong.

10. I believe I’m not worthy of anything.

11. I’m so lazy, I can’t get anything done.

If you see yourself in one of the above statements, then chances are, they are holding you back from living your best life. If none of these statements ring true, then ask yourself , “What beliefs are holding me back?”

Why is this important? Because our beliefs about ourselves can have positive and/or negative effects on how we live our lives. Do you try to set goals for yourself and then decide you’ll never reach them because you have a belief that you can’t? Or has someone in authority, whether parents, teachers or others, told you something about yourself that you believe to be true?

Beliefs are important, obviously. Beliefs about who we are are ingrained in us from a very young age. They help us develop our self image. Over the years, some of those beliefs about ourselves can become so ingrained for better or worse, that they become unconscious. For many of us, we don’t question those beliefs about ourselves until we come face to face with a problem that we just can’t seem to solve in our life, or we start to feel so badly about ourself that we search out help from a professional.

For someone who has ADHD, negative beliefs about themselves can become landmines. They lurk in the path of success, often detonating at the most unsuspecting moments. ADHDers are often told all about the negative effects of having ADHD by doctors, teachers and even parents.. Those negative effects can become deep seated beliefs. Some of those false ideas are:

1. You will not be able to go to college

2. You will never be able to focus enough to finish any project

3. You will have trouble finding and keeping friends

4. You will become addicted to your meds

5. If you let your employer know you have ADHD, then you’ll get fired

6. You will struggle to have a successful romantic relationship

7. If you get labeled in school then people will look at you differently and negatively.

ADHDers are told these lies by well meaning people. These lies easily become beliefs. These beliefs then become such a part of the ADHDers life, that the ADHDer truly believes that they won’t be successful in life because they have ADHD. Then it becomes very difficult to unravel the harm. It takes a lot of hard work and time and patience and possibly even a lot of money to help the ADHDer challenge these beliefs and find a new way of seeing themselves. Therapy, counseling and coaching the ADHDer are ways to help them navigate the damaging beliefs they have about themselves, but can be so worth it. A new and exciting way of thinking about themselves will emerge, proving to themselves and others that yes, they can have a successful and fulfilling life.

It’s ADHD awareness month.  For those of you who are reading this and want to learn about the myths and facts of ADHD, please click or copy and paste into your browser the following link.  By learning about these myths and facts, you can help debunk many misconceptions and prevent negative beliefs.   

Myths and Facts about ADHD